First sem, but shouldn't I push myself harder?

My true form reveals when it comes to exam and trouble. STRESS!!! I was looking for comfort everywhere I can, trying to read as much as I can. Now I wonder, is this REALLY what I want?

... ... ... ... ... ...

This is what I can answer... I'm in a lot of stress right now. Seeing my friends working so hard, I don't want to loose out as well. However hard I tried to study and revise, it's like these information just won't stick to my mind... God, do help me!!!

Maybe I'm taking this too easily or I've yet to feel the stress. Or it might be I've been to harsh on myself til I can't remember the facts now...

Anyway, I just have to keep it going...

KEEP STRIVING!!!

Note to self: Life is never easy my dear Eain Yi. Just make the best out of ur life!!! (/n,n\)

First sem, but shouldn't I push myself harder?

My true form reveals when it comes to exam and trouble. STRESS!!! I was looking for comfort everywhere I can, trying to read as much as I can. Now I wonder, is this REALLY what I want?

... ... ... ... ... ...

This is what I can answer... I'm in a lot of stress right now. Seeing my friends working so hard, I don't want to loose out as well. However hard I tried to study and revise, it's like these information just won't stick to my mind... God, do help me!!!

Maybe I'm taking this too easily or I've yet to feel the stress. Or it might be I've been to harsh on myself til I can't remember the facts now...

Anyway, I just have to keep it going...

KEEP STRIVING!!!

Note to self: Life is never easy my dear Eain Yi. Just make the best out of ur life!!! (/n,n\)

Why me? I'm totally innocent... ='(

ok, celebrated 2 person's birthday today. I wonder why when I open my mouth, I tend to become the target when I'm trying to get another person to be the target. I'm being over-reacted, yes I might. But come on, this is not the 1st time. I don't like to steal the spotlight, nor I like to be the only flower during winter. Attention? Please.... NOT ON ME...

I was trying to drag the main character in when the 2 birthday boy & girl were "asked" to give a speech on how the felt during the celebration just now. Oh my dear senior, why must you so "kind" and tell out my name? For a moment, all eyes were onto me, it was so quiet, and I couldn't bear it! Guess what I've said in front of my comm mates?

"Why am I dragged into the water as well...?" So I turn and find a much comfortable place to hide ---> in the dark!

It has never been comfortable when I become the center of attention. From today onwards, I'm staying far away from guys. Message can. But chit chat... better less. I don't know how to interact with them anyway.

I'm ALWAYS a dumb dull person. I rather stick to my form 6 guys... after all, there is my comfort zone =)

feeling ill. Just hope my birthday wish works : Healthy always for all the people around me.

Stress... stress...stress!!!

I wonder how people usually cope with their stress. I thought I can make myself less vulnerable to stress as I grow older, more matured... yet, I'm still so easily stressed =(

This week was supposed to be our study week, but lecturers all wanted to continue with all the incomplete lectures, incomplete presentations.... These few week I am so STRESSED!!! Who can I talk to? The only thing is to hit myself, hope to become more efficient in time management.

I'm down to illness these few days. Tomorrow's Academic Communication Talk show? Expect me with my course voice on!!! =P I just wish I can cope well this week, as it'll be hectic, hard to bear and more STRESSED.... (again, I can't run away from stress)

My parents have been angels to me, giving all the comfort I need, providing all the nutrients I need. 3 home-cooked dinners this week, HURRAY!!!! Love papa & mommy's cooking so much. Although so, I still can feel myself being unwell. You know, the kind of feeling like my nose gonna bleed any time soon, I'm going to faint any time soon... I'm not kidding, this is how I am feeling now, and when it gets worse, I will start to have massive headaches. Why must the weather be so unbearable???

ok, now is not the time for me to put more stress on myself, I have plenty more to worry about. So, just finish up all my projects and study extra extra hard for my finals = 11 days left!!! Ahhh, PANIC!!!!

Anyhow, I must juggle between all these, take step-by-step measurements again. Again, health wins over everything. No health, no exam, no future, no love, no family... So must have health!!!! Don't slip away from my hands health!!!!

Prepare for "no-sleeping" days!!!! Keep your mind active all the time Eain Yi. But please don't be crazy in the process. =)

p/s: forgive my childlishness, Kannie said I'm 89.9% childlish, though she wouldn't tell me how she calculated that.

Han --> Inspired by Jung Ji-Hoon (Rain)

Korean has this term called "Han", translated into English means --- Unfinished Business. To Rain, his "Han" is he didn't get to do much for his mother. To my father, his "Han" was to give his children a better life than his.

And now, I'm on my journey, in search of my "Han".

Family, I do wish I'll always be around them =)

Think of the positive, not the other side...

Few days back, I was deep down in the dumps. Friends, few of them who really cares, chat with me, and try to "unwind" the knot in my heart. But one friend, a.k.a. my counselor, she knows me thoroughly in and out. And this is what I quoted out of our conversation a.k.a. counseling session.

"Eain Yi, you don't know your full potential. I know you. You can be so much greater than what you are now. Work hard, and one day, you'll know your potential."

~ Sha ~

- not the exact words, but the meaning is similar -

This simple sentence, really trigger my thoughts.

Here I am, complaining and whining about things, worrying about things I don't have to.

There she is, far away alone in a foreign country, as cold as ever in Russia, struggling hard with so much more things than I am up against.

Who will she complain to? She can't find anyone to comfort her there. The things I'm whining about is only the least of my worries.

So, why am I here wasting my time and energy over it? My problems are nothing compare to hers.

I was used to be as tough as she is, since when I've become a cry-baby? No, this post will remind me, of how I should deal with life! One simple rule....

I just want a happy life ^^

The beginning of a new journey

As the title has mentioned, UKM is the beginning of a new journey to me. After taking 2 mid-sem exams and 2 more to go, I'm starting to wonder, I begin to have worries, I'm pondering as the date to my next exam is getting closer. And I haven't prepare for it yet.

These are my doubts.....

Question no. 1 : will I make it in UKM understanding it's only 3 years?

My answer: .......er.....I.... don't...... know.....

My father always tell me, why worry over things you don't know yet? He got a point on that, why should I worry then? It's a waste of energy for stressing on things that you don't know yet. Don't always think of negativeness, most of the time positivity wins! =) 頑張って!!!!

Question no. 2 : is this course meant for me? Is this what I really want?

My answer: Probably I can't make it.

Again, this answer is not a "sure" answer. I might have thought of giving up, thinking of it is not easy to study. But somehow I rethink, nothing is easy in life, nothing is impossible in life! It all depends on how strong is your will, don't let your doubts take over you, you control what you want to be!

As my father always say,

If I fail to plan, I plan to FAIL.

I always hold my father's advices as my life principles. I love my father! This shows that HE DOES CARE.

Question no. 3 : So far, question 3 hasn't occur. And by all means, I hope it will not occur.

This is silly! It's a series of self-asking and self-answering questions. But anyhow, it clears my mind a bit. So I've found a purpose for writing a blog! It really do makes my sure of my direction now. ^^

**p/s: For those who read this, consider I'm a lunatic and please do disregard my insaneness. Thank you =)